pretty important links

https://thoughtcatalog.com/juliet-lanka/2018/04/these-30-mistakes-are-accidentally-making-you-come-across-as-socially-awkward/?utm_source=quora

One for normal behaviour^

https://www.independent.co.uk/voices/ways-to-help-with-anxiety-science-medication-study-a8310406.html?utm_source=quora

Easiest way to beat anxiety^

Everyone’s fiji water and so are you

A habit I need to develop everyday is to stop putting people on a pedestal but also not burying them deep.
I’ve found that when I am in a fun mood and less careful and less anxious around people (cause why should I right) I don’t try to be. Like I don’t try being compliant obedient blah. People feel normal this way cause everyone’s like that.
Plus I need my holidays to be more productive. Lemme update you with all new things I did everyday. I hope I do.

Having more fun and not taking life so seriously

Heyy. So its only some days into my vacation and I feel uh may zayn.
The overthinking about friends and all is at its complete low andI'm still feeling good and aspire to be this way throughouttt uh.
So today's day mark's some ass's birthday, buttt not that I care. I mean I totally could rationalize the situation: Like before I was all like you know he's good friends with so many people and they love him and all and I was ALMOST gonna text him but thanks to Guj I stopped and I was like of course im not gonna do something so stupid cause he never wished me too.
Details lol.
Also me ans my virtual best friend are back to normal.
And how I rationalised this? i mean of COURSE I haven't like been his real life friend for long. Mostly virtual and very little real life.
But since he got pretty close to me and real (in an emotional sense of course) I REALLY know the guy is full of shit.
And he's good at being pretentious so that works for everyone. Not that he's that bad, It's good that he and I shared some good moments and it was pretty cool and all but he's not worth it.
But you know, he undermined me and all, so.

Here's some good potential links helping me out:
https://www.bolde.com/lighten-stop-taking-everything-seriously/
https://medium.com/darius-foroux/i-have-15-ideas-to-change-your-life-do-you-have-5-minutes-f84c3f99b3c5
https://www.wikihow.com/Have-Fun-All-the-Time

Also this one's for being too nice:
https://tinybuddha.com/blog/are-you-too-nice-how-to-be-kind-and-be-good-to-yourself/

I recently got... that's right a set of COPICSSSSSS. IM SO HAPPYYYY.
So I tested it out:

Happiness

All I can say for now, I feel amazing. After all of those blog posts about my cramming and changes, I knew it was all for good. And here I am, having made progress. I feel great. :D

I can now be normal in social situations. It doesn't scare me as much and I definitely do not feel like running away. I feel more close to me if that makes sense.
It's been 2 days since my exam has been over so its good, and also well, my birthday.

Well here's a description of my birthday: Got a call from Vanshika around 11:40 and then we decided she'd call me at 12:00 so that we could study. But of course we were texting each other about how it would have been better if we'd been talking cause we weren't studying anyways.

She seems kinda flawless. It was great talking to her. And my birthday wasn't like I was expecting. I mean, Iw asn't really expecting ANYTHING. hahah. But it was SOOO good.
Then I was getting so many calls; One from Pavanta too, I think around 12- Then Roshni and Mansi's call got missed cause I was talking to others.

And the day was pretty cool. Except the fact that I had to study and it was my exam. But anyway the school part wasn't so happening or anything- although I got an amazing gift from Pavanta- oh so heartfelt- a toothpaste.

 At home I got a surprise from Pavanta, which was SO unexpected. I wasn't really putting in much effort in our friendship. I pretty much thought we don't sync that much. But it was just my less social motivation.
And we did have quite a lot of fun. She brought this birthday cap and some desserts and we watched 13 reasons why's first episode and she's got my book for now.
She's a keeper as a friend. I should make more effort.
           I went to Pablo's to meet Yukta. We'd been planning it for long. We had 2 fancy mocktails and we weren't there for long, 45 mins tops.

It was fun tho. I wore my black crop top and ripped jeans for my birthday. And I forgot to take off the tag again lmao.
Then I went to Mocha with my three usual people. Roshni did so much effort so that we'd have fun and I love her for that.
We ordered LOADSA stuff. There was this live singer and 'twas a fun night.

And all of these people tagged me in their posts and it was great.
-----------
Its day 2 of vacation and it was mainly supposed to be me, Mehak, Pavanta and Maitreyee to be meeting. First it was Bouffage, then to Mocha. Where we met Shriya, Sanskruti and Ishrita too.

So eventually we ended up sitting with them. It was some new experience and I'm proud to say i wasn't anxious at all.
I had some sips of this Cosmo drink cause like why not.
So all I need to do is to up my social game a bit. Then I'll feel much better.

Some cool tips which helped me through this: (Follow it judiciously)

Meditation/ Deep Breathing
Optimistic
Pushing through the social comfort at times
Comfort in own skin
Halt at overthinking
Past is over
Having social circle